4.12.2015

Bullied Over Boys

Personally, I do not care for the trendy 'anti-bully' movement which is all about controlling others. I hold the radical belief that people should control themselves by growing stronger spines and learning to ignore idiots, because that is what I have had to do and what I continue to do every day of my life. What makes everyone else so special that they do not have to do the same? This is the real world; welcome to it!

Just where do you think all my character comes from anyway...shoveling snow? Hardly! It comes from being picked on, teased, laughed at, made fun of, rejected and hated on -- including from family members -- and it has only made me stronger for the wear. Bully, indeed!

So, to showcase my new I (Heart) Boys design at Society6, I wanted to share the 'bullying' back story inspiration of its creation since I still remember the playground incident. It does not bother me to the point of making my blood boil, nothing like that, but it stands out well in my memory as a character-defining moment in my life and a lesson in human nature everyone can learn from. 

It was during the 1980s; I was in third grade at the time and one day I wore a round pin-back button to school that stated 'I (Heart) Boys.' I do not remember where I got the button, but I loved it and wore it with pride. After all, I liked boys, and still do, so I had no problem whatsoever declaring the sentiment. I thought the button itself was cute and to remember it makes me smile. 

However, a handful of female classmates thought this was wrong and decided to pick on me for daring to admit that I liked boys; they laughed, they pointed, they whispered, they shunned. They did not hit, kick, or pull hair (that is called assault, not 'bullying'), but they made me feel bad for expressing myself. Or, perhaps more correctly, I allowed them to make me feel bad for expressing myself. Basically, I was hated for embracing my  heterosexuality...as if!

To this day, over 25 years later, I remember that incident. I also remember feeling ashamed to wear the button after that, only because I did not want to get picked on again by the herd, even though I never stopped liking boys. Well, to those mean girls I politely bite my thumb and say: Bully on you for making me stronger and inspiring me to recreate the message for others to enjoy...so there!

The moral in this story is that humans can be assholes (at all ages) and they are especially assholish to people they are threatened by due to any number of reasons. When I look back on this incident, I surmise that I was picked on due to my boldness for declaring I liked something that others did not like -- or were too scared to admit they liked in the face of peer pressure and groupthink  -- which made me stand out as being different; and that is what gets picked on the most -- differences.

This is something called 'psychology' that I have since read up on and it has helped me a great deal when it comes to understanding the mindset of people who pick, tease, point, laugh, hate, or as it is more popularly called 'bully.' I invite others to click here and learn what I have learned with helpful mind-over-matter reference material from Dr. Izzy Kalman.


Thank You for Daring to (Heart) Boys!

Like the designs?
I (Heart) Boys @ Society6

Like what you read?
Donate & Support Eve's Blog


Please Visit
My Stores
Distribly  *  eBay  *  PayLoadz  *  Society 6  *  Zazzle  *
My Blogs
Black Flag Canna  *  Cosmic Pix  *  Eve Penman  *  Fungus Rules  *

Social Media
Contact
eMail  *
Facebook  *  Flickr  *  G+  *  MySpace  *
PaperLi  *  Pinterest  *  Twitter  *  YouTube  *


Olympic Peninsula MMJ
Blog Sponsor

4.04.2015

How to Strike at the Root with Your Words

At times it is hard to keep my snarky sarcastic cynicism in check when I am surrounded by so many nincompoops in social media and the world at large; this is something I work on every moment I breathe and some moments are better than others. 

I know, nincompoops is not a flattering term, but I calls them like I sees them. The thing is, some people truly are stupid and foolish, and if you are a mortal you cannot help but be mortally foolish, myself included. If you have not noticed, these days stating an opinion on social media is considered activism by the nincompooptic masses...and you can't spell 'masses' without 'asses'!

However, there are better ways to voice one's opinion other than by dumping it in Twitville, FaceBox, or any other site that allows people to share what they think faster than they can think. Every day I exercise my will to stop from doing such things, though sometimes my self-restraint is nowhere to be found and I join in with the (m)asses without taking a step back to breathe and consider:

What am I trying to say with my message
and who am I wanting to reach?  

Therein lies the rub, stopping to think!
Lately, due to public court cases being what they are -- 24/7 speculation for the (m)asses -- no thanks in part to mainstream media and celebrities who believe it is their right to make other people's business their own, everyone is now up in arms over some case about a cake...or is it a pizza?...or tomorrow it could be something else...in a state I do not live in nor pay taxes in...which means I do not give a flying flip over what goes on there!

Honestly, I do not keep up on such hogwash because I am not getting paid to care any longer and -- here is the kicker -- those people are not keeping up on my hogwash. I mean, as if! So I see no good reason to follow their hogwash if they are unable to treat me like an equal and pay my hogwash mind as well. So there's equality for you, baby.

Granted, it is irksome when one court case can impact hundreds, thousands, and millions of people -- the same people who do not give a flying flip about a million other court cases that could equally impact them that are going on this very instant!  -- but it is more irksome to me when one court case impacts the people who are the plaintiffs and defendants. You know, the ones who had to pay for the lawyers, take the risk, go to court, be questioned about everything in their lives during depositions, and live with the outcome more than anybody else. 

It is not that I am on either party's side in these courtroom dramas, but more that I am on both sides; such is my empathetic lot in life.

I sincerely invite people to sit through as many court cases as I have, from the unbiased seating position I had, in order to see the battle scars inflicted in realtime -- in front of your own eyes! -- all which are caused by fighting in court. The battlefield called Court does not discriminate between plaintiff and defendant; everyone is her bitch equally. Nobody said court was pretty and it is a mother if ever there was one.

This is all stuff I learned as a court reporter, which is why I tune most of this nonsense out now...until it cannot be ignored since the (m)asses will not shut up about things which are not their business!

So, what is my business in writing this then, other than to air my grievances in cyberspace? My business in this is to inform the vociferous so-called activists what they can do with their words, if they really want to make a difference that is.

Mind you, this is only for people who want to make a difference and impact people's lives for the better This is not for the people who want to disagree and pick fights for the sake of picking fights. Fighting is easy, that is why everyone does it so readily...especially when they do not have a dog in the fight!  Agreeing and promoting what one agrees with is hard and challenging, which is why so few do it. 

Therefore, if a person (1) wants their message to be heard and (2) wants to make a change for the better, I encourage people not to voice their message in social media, but rather search out the person who needs to hear a positive message so that they know they have someone on their side.

Please, this is not about sending hate-filled messages to the side a person opposes, which is what is most easily done by haters and non-thinkers. Um, that is, like, totally not radical...that is predictable and pretentious and pure poppycock!

This is about sending a message to someone to let them know they have someone else on their side, which is what is most often not done because people, for some reason, prefer to waste their energy opposing what they hate instead of supporting what they love. Been there, done that, time to evolve!

Few things in life feel worse than losing a court case and thinking you are all alone in the battle that follows when the court's orders must be carried out against your desire to carry them out. Seriously, how do you feel  when you are forced to do something at work which you do not agree with based on your personal preferences....such as wearing an outfit of polyester that makes your butt look bigger than you want, or serving food you would not eat if it were the last thing on earth, or selling books you would rather burn than read? Gag me. It totally sucks hose water!

And yet, when someone offers you kind words of comfort that lets you know they understand your burden, the burden somehow becomes lessened and what you are forced to do somehow becomes tolerable once you know you are not alone.

Likewise, winning a court case can be a nice feeling, in spite of the cost and personal toll it can take through depositions and being questioned on every nuance in your life; because even when you initiate the lawsuit you are then a target for the other party's lawyer(s). Receiving words of congratulations and support for taking on a hard battle can make that party feel good too and it lets them know they are not alone either. Even winners can feel alone just like losers; that, too, is equality, baby.

Whatever side people agree with is none of my business -- but people love to forgo their right to privacy and make it other people's business by posting it in social media! -- and that is why I encourage people to take the task upon themselves to (1) search out public contact information so they can (2) send their positive thoughts directly to the party they support. Mind you, just so long as they are in favor with that party.

This is not about hating what you oppose.  This is about cheering what you support. Radical, I know. As well, I do not promote doing what I do not do myself. In the past, when I was being paid to care, I have done exactly what I encourage others to do; I sent positive emails to businesses whose actions I agreed with and who the news poo-pooed, to which I received positive responses back from the businesses thanking me for my words of support. Therefore, I encourage others to do the same. You might be surprised how far a few kind words go to make an impact for the better in this wicked world.

Stop. Think. Strike.
What are you trying to say with your message?
Who are you wanting to reach?
Think about it and then strike at the root.

Whether you agree with this message or disagree, feel free to comment and share with others...because there is no such thing as bad publicity, only wasted energy!




Thank You for Striking at the Root!
Please Visit
My Stores
Distribly  *  eBay  *  PayLoadz  *  Society 6  *  Zazzle  *
My Blogs
Black Flag Canna  *  Cosmic Pix  *  Eve Penman  *  Fungus Rules  *

Social Media
Contact
eMail  *
Facebook  *  Flickr  *  G+  *  MySpace  *
PaperLi  *  Pinterest  *  Twitter  *  YouTube  *


Olympic Peninsula MMJ
Blog Sponsor